Unbearably lie

I did a mistake, yes i did. 
How can i erase the mistake that i have been done? 
I just don't know how.
Now, the guilt is killing me.
As i, will never make it up from it.
Will he ever gonna forgive me once i told him about it?
Knowing him, he probably wouldn't.
I means, who would ever forgive or forget?
I'm sure, if it's him who do the same mistake that i did, i'll never forgive him.
For sure.
So, how can i expect a forgiveness from him?
Can the truth be kept as a lie?
Can it?
Or shall i be clean about it?
Will i lose him once the truth be told?
Or forever he'll be on my side?
Tell me God, what shall i do? 
Regretting the mistake that i've done, sure there is no point for it.
But to tell the truth and lose him at the same time, it is unbearable.
Same goes to not telling him about the mistake, it is unforgettable.
What had happened to me?
How can i be like this?
Please dear God, heard my prayer.
Losing him, it is painful but lying on his face is equally the same.
As i know, how faithful he is towards me.
For all these times ...